Make that 3,629,081 people now rolling on the floor after watching the Enterprise bridge crew lose it after suffering through 10 consecutive hours of the Miley Cyrus Distortion. Her performance at MTV’s 2013 Video Music Awards spread like a virus permeating intersteller space. I certainly hope child stars are briefed on the requirement to lose their friggin mind after they morph into adulthood. In the immortal words of James T. Kirk: “What is . . . that?” Indeed!

Spock's vulcan mind cannot process the Miley Cyrus 2013 VMA performance.

Shock and Awe: Spock watches Miley Cyrus 2013 VMA performance.